The first grief note posted ended with the thought that family and friends can be the sustaining force and a great source of strength for those who are grieving. Because the grieving process is long, with some days being more difficult than others a support team is a must. Members of that team need not entail a multiplicity of persons. As few as 2 or 3 persons with caring hearts, ears willing to listen when the need arises, and a ready spirit to be there for you will suffice.
Because family members are themselves grieving persons, having trusted friends could be very helpful to form your support team. It is amazing how friends from one’s past can serve as the needed support persons. If your support persons have themselves experienced a loss or losses in their lives, this is a plus. They will be able to readily relate to your experiences.
In selecting your support team members the persons to be avoided are those who believe that they can “fix you” as you proceed into the future with your life. Those who impose suggestions, give what they consider to be wise counsel, the criticizers, and those who would rush you through your grief are to be eliminated from your list of support persons.
Take enough time to select well, and by all means ask our dear God for the wisdom to know who best will assist you. Having caring others to accompany you as you grieve, no matter how long the journey takes, is a true gift. Once you have received the commitment of your support team, be sure to express your gratitude to them periodically for the gift that their presence is to you.
As a follow-up to the information about the on-going Grief Support Group at St. Matthias Church in Lanham, there will be forth-coming grief notes to be shared with you, our readers.
Losses are much a part of each of our lives. Some are smaller losses, others are significant and heart-breaking.
Our smaller losses we experience for a much shorter period of time. We feel the disappointment, some sadness, or perhaps shed some tears. In several hours or perhaps in a few days we let go of some of the feelings and expectations we had, and are able to move on to other things in our lives.
Bigger losses, that bring more serious consequences, are those that entail losing a loved one to death or though divorce; losing health through a serious illness; or perhaps losing one’s financial well-being. The serious consequences include a deep sense of sadness and a feeling of complete disruption of one’s life. We grieve these losses for weeks, months, or perhaps a year or years. During that time we shed our tears, reminisce what we had, process our deep feelings, and expect healing to occur in time. This is grief, a process we can’t avoid or easily dismiss. It is a process through which each person must pass despite its difficulty. The love of family and friends can be our sustaining force.
St. Matthias the Apostle Parish welcomes those who have faced a significant loss to join its on-going Grief Support Group. Participants experience the support and caring of other grieving persons, as well as receive helpful information about grieving and the grief process. Sessions are held every Saturday from 9 – 10:30 AM in the school library.
New members will be integrated into the group beginning with the week of September 24th.
For more information contact: Miriam Jacik MSN, MS Psy, the Group Coordinator at (301) 345-6054. Or you just may feel free to come.
Miriam is the best of the best. You feel so much better after attending the group sessions. You can share with the group if you want and hear that you are not alone in your grief process. Just go and see what will happen to you.