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In this grief note we will look at the topic of writing  out some of our grief experiences as our grief work proceeds.  Many grief authors refer to this as keeping a grief journal.  Some people believe that they cannot write with any degree of ease, especially while they are grieving.  This sounds like a difficult undertaking, butit is a very profitable one that is also personally rewarding.

 

Some are convinced that writing requires too much time and energy. While one is grieving much emotional energy is needed to grieve, heal, and progress through the grief process.  Therefore, the idea of writing about one’s personal thoughts, feelings, and experiences is unappealing and considered too hard to undertake.

 

To begin the writing process one simply needs a writing instrument (pen or pencil) and a writing tablet.  A fancy book for journaling is not a must.  Setting aside time to jot down the thoughts, feelings, and personal experiences one is having is also necessary.  There is no mandate that one make entries on a daily basis, although this may be helpful. Simply putting on paper experiences or concerns as they occur can be beneficial.  One chooses the time to do this – the morning hours or in the evening.  Whenever serves one’s needs.

 

Thoughts, concerns, or worries  that are not given attention swirl about in the mind, picking up momentum along the way.  They easily emerge at night, thus robbing one of a peaceful rest, so needed by the weary body and the grief-stricken spirit. So, notations made on an “as needed” basis or even daily can prevent disruptive sleep from happening and can ease the mind.

 

As already mentioned, there are benefits to  writing while grieving.  These are a few of them:

 one’s mind can become freed of sad, troubling issues
 it provides one with an indication of how well one’s passage through the grieving process is proceeding
 writing is a perfect means of expression, especially if one’s support system is meager or absent
 writing provides the opportunity to explore personal or private matters that one is not  ready to share with others
 one receives a measure of one’s progress (or lack of) that has occurred since the time of one’s loss
 a clarification of troubling issues that need resolution can  occur, warranting an exploration of a troubled relationship, the need for forgiveness, and other “unfinished business”

 

With all of these benefits in mind, it would seem wise to give writing or journaling a try.  It is a valuable tool for many grieving persons.  The two essential requirements are allotting the time and expending the needed energy to accomplish the undertaking.

 

The Association of the Antorcha Guadalupana began at the end of the 20th centuary in the United States thanks to the Association of the Antorhca Guadalupana in New York. The first few years of the Association the running of the torch would begin on the U.S side of the border between Mexico and the United States and ended in the Cathedral of San Patrick in New York City. It was because of the Association of the Antorcha Guadalupana that the running of the torch was able to cross the border between Mexico and the U.S. Since 2002 the Antorcha Guadalupana has been traveling through 9 states in Mexico (the state of Mexico, Morelos, Guerrero, Puebla, Oaxaca, Hidalgo, Tlaxcala, Veracruz and Tamaulipas) and 14 states in the United States (Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia, South Carolina, Virginia, Washington D.C., Maryland, Delaware, , New Jersey, and New York)  

Since then over 8 million people across Mexico and the United States have participated in the Antorcha Guadalupana. Saint Matthias has had the honor of participating in this wonderful event for the past 3 years. Many parishes across both countries have participated. This year, Saint Matthias received the torch from Saint Bernard Catholic Church in Riverdale, Maryland and from Saint Matthias, the torch was taken to Saint Mary’s Catholic Church located in Landover Hills, Maryland.

 

The Parish Social Life Committee is proud to assist Father Jack again this year in recognizing the many parishioners who regularly give their “Time, Talent, and Treasure” to help make St. Matthias Church a fine and friendly place of worship. The Second Annual Volunteer Luncheon will be on Sunday, March 10th, from 2:00-4:00 PM in Friendship Hall. If you are an active member of a parish organization or ministry that provides services to the church or community,

please submit this RSVP form no later than Sunday, February 17th.

It is greatly appreciated that there are many groups that meet at various times in the church during the week. However, the Volunteer Luncheon is to “honor” those ministries/organizations that assist in the holy Masses and/or offer services to others within the church and community.

The following are the volunteer ministries/organizations:
Altar Servers, Altar Committee, Choirs, Dance Ministry, Eucharistic Ministers, Faith Formation, Flower Committee, Front Office Workers, Greeters, Knights of Columbus (KOC), ladies of Charity {LOC}, lectors, Music Ministry, Parish Social Life Committee {PSLC), Projectors Monitor Ministry, Ushers, and Youth Ministry

Mark your calendar!
ST. MATTHIAS ANNUAL VOLUNTEER LUNCHEON ON SUNDAY, MARCH 10, 2019, 2 TO 4 PM IN FRIENDSHIP HALL. DRESS IS SUNDAY CASUAL. ONLY REGISTERED VOLUNTEERS MAY ATTEND.

 

As we move through the holidays this year, including Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza, and New Years, my hope, prayer, and wishes are that you, the readers of this message, have been able to capture the essence of the season.  With the support and caring of friends and family, persons who are grieving can experience the joy of the holidays.

 

Some important things to remember about holiday celebrations are reviewed at this time.

 Where someone is in their grieving process will certainly affect how he or she will experience the various occasions.  Those in the early phase of their loss (the first 5 months or so) can let each holiday pass them by without engaging in too much celebrating.  During the mid grieving point  holidays can receive a half-hearted reception.  When the healing that grief provides has come, in a later point of grief, the festivities are more easily accepted and celebrated. 

 

 The process of facing a significant loss, as any grieving person knows, can consume a lot of personal energy.  Therefore, simplifying holiday celebrations is a must.

 

 Planning one’s celebrations in collaboration with family members and friends can more easily guarantee happy times and some real joy as each significant day comes and passes.

 

 Accepting the efforts of others, with reasonable but marginal contributions on the part of the grieving person, can  bring about, as well as honor, some of the traditions of the past.

 

And so, open your hearts to the joy and meaning of the season.  Doing what feels right in your heart can bring you the wonders of these special days, as they come one by one.

 

Breve de Duelo #20

A medida que avanzamos a través de las vacaciones de este año, incluyendo-Navidad, Hanukkah, Kwanza, y Año Nuevo, mi esperanza, oración y deseo es que ustedes, leyentes de este mensaje, hayan podido captar  la esencia de la temporada. Con el apoyo y la atención de amigos y familiares, las personas que están de duelo pueden experimentar la alegría de las vacaciones. Algunas cosas importantes para recordar acerca de las celebraciones de vacaciones se revisan en este momento.

  • El hecho de que alguien se encuentre en su proceso de duelo afectará la forma en que experimentará las diversas ocasiones. Aquellos en la fase temprana de su pérdida (los primeros 5 meses aproximadamente) pueden dejar pasar cada día festivo sin tener que celebrar demasiado. Durante el punto medio de duelo, los días festivos pueden recibir una recepción poco entusiastas. Cuando la curación que proporciona la aflicción llega, en un punto posterior de aflicción, las festividades son más fácilmente aceptadas y celebradas.
  • El proceso de enfrentar una pérdida significativa, como sabe cualquier persona afligida, puede consumir mucha energía personal. Por lo tanto, simplificar las celebraciones de vacaciones es una necesidad.
  • Planear las celebraciones en colaboración con miembros de la familia y amigos puede garantizar más fácilmente momentos felices y un poco de alegría real a medida que cada día importante llega y pasa.
  • Aceptar los esfuerzos de otros, con contribuciones razonables pero marginales por parte de la persona afligida, puede provocar, además de honrar, algunas de las tradiciones del pasado.

Y así, abren sus corazónes a la alegría y el significado de la temporada. Hacer lo que se siente bien en tu corazón puede traerte las maravillas de estos días especiales, ya que vienen uno por uno

 

Dear Friends, On behalf of Father Canice and our visiting clergy, I offer you best wishes for a blessed and happy Christmas. We look forward to the coming year as we continue to grow in faith.

Sincerely in Christ, Father Jack

Christmas Mass Schedule

Monday, December 24, 2018

Daily Mass at 8:30 AM

Christmas Vigil Mass at 5:00 PM

Christmas Vigil Mass at 10:00 PM (Christmas Carols begin at 9:30 PM)

Tuesday, December 25, 2018 Christmas Day

Masses: 8:00 AM, 11:30 AM, 1:30 PM (Spanish)

Monday, December 31, 2018

Daily Mass 8:30 AM

“Crossover” Mass at 11:00 PM

Tuesday, January 1, 2019

Solemnity of the Holy Mother of God (A Holy Day of Obligation)

Daily Mass at 8:30 AM

Mass at 10:30 AM (Bilingual)

 

The Parish Office will be Closed Monday, December 24th and Tuesday, December 25th, in observance of Christmas. The office will re-open Wednesday, December 26th, at 8:00 AM

Day of the Dead
October 31st-November 2nd
Day of the Dead is a Hispanic holiday that goes on for 3 days. Starting on October 31st and ending on November 2nd. During these days we focus our attention on our dearly beloved families and friends that have passed away. During these days the families of the dearly departed put up an altar of their deceased including pictures, food, toys for children, candy, sugar skulls called calavers, candles, marigolds, and a red flower called terciopelo. The belief is that in placing a path of marigolds and terciopelo the souls of the deceased can find their way to the alter that their families have made in their homes in honor of the dead. Usually in Mexico and Central America the families of the deceased go to the graveyards and stay with their dead all night decorating their tombs with flowers, candles and singing songs. Día de los Muertos is a time to celebrate the lives of our deceased. Remembering that death is but the next adventure for them.
 
 
Día de los Muertos
31 de Octubre-2 de Noviembre de 2018
El Día de Los Muertos es un celebración hispana que dura 3 días, empezando el 31 de Octubre para terminar el 2 de Noviembre. Estos días se enfocan en nuestros fieles difuntos y celebrado la vida que tuvieron aquí en la tierra. En estos días las familias de los fieles difuntos se acostumbra a poner fotos de los difuntos, comida que les gusto en la vida, juguetes para los niños, dulces, calaveras, flores cempasúchil de color amarillo y terciopelo de color rojo, y velas. La creencia es que poniendo un camino de pétalos de cempasúchil y terciopelo en frente de los altares nuestros fieles difuntos pueden encontrar el camino para llegar al alter que su familia ha puesto para ellos. Así las almas de los difunto pueden disfrutar de todas las cosas que les gusto en la vida. Usualmente en México y países de Centro América las familias van al panteón con el mismo tipo de flores para ponerlo al redero de las tumbas. El Día de Los Muertos es un tiempo para celebrar la vida de nuestros difuntos y que la muerte solo es la siguiente aventura para ellos.
 

Thursday, November 1st, is the Solemnity of All Saints, a Holy Day of Obligation. Masses will be celebrated at 8:30 AM, 12:00 PM, 7:00 PM, and 8:15 PM (in Spanish).

The Annual Mass of Remembrance, commemorating the souls of our faithful departed, will be celebrated on November 3rd at the Saturday Vigil Mass at 5:00 PM. All are welcome as we remember those who have died this past year and pray for their families who mourn the loss of their loved ones.

The Parish Social Life Committee invites you to a Multicultural Festival next Saturday, September 8th, from 12:00-4:00 PM. Raffle tickets are available at $ 5 each or 3 for $10. Prizes include a microwave oven, television, tablet, and a $100 Amazon gift card. Tickets may be purchased from PSLC members or at the parish office. We now have Festival T-shirts available in sizes for every member of your family. The cost is $15.00 for adult sizes, and $ 10.00 for youth. Shirts may be purchased after Mass or in the Hughes Center dur- ing regular business hours.

We begin this Grief Brief with the often asked question: “How long will this grieving last?” The simple response is that it will last for as long as is needed for each individual person.  People grieve for as long as it takes to heal from a very difficult life event – the loss of a loved one or some other significant loss.

The length of one’s grieving time depends on many factors.  Those who have accompanied a loved through a long illness, perhaps as the caregiver, have already done some of their grieving- but not all. They grieve for as long as is necessary after the death.  Sudden deaths, because they entail no time to prepare, may require that one experience grief for a  longer timeframe, depending upon circumstances.  Traumatic deaths from shootings, stabbings, suicides, accidents, natural disasters, drug overdoses, or the tragedies of war usually have an extended period of grieving because of the grave circumstances of the deaths. The nature of one’s relationship with the deceased will certainly impact grieving time, as well.

Waiting solely for time to pass will not bring about the healing from grief that is necessary or required to enable one to go on with his or her life in a meaningful manner.  Losses require grief work, and that is exactly what it is –work.  It is helpful to realize that grief work requires experiencing all of the feelings that the loss has stirred up.  Speaking to trusted others about one’s loss is helpful. Writing out one’s feelings helps as well.  Reminiscing about the time spent with the loved one, remembering that person on special occasions, and celebrating the life of the person in some special manner will all be a necessary part of the grief work that one does.

When considering time and grieving it is important to look at the phases of time – yesterday, today, and tomorrow.  It is comforting initially to return to memories of the no-too-distant past, for it is there that the sad, but recent, memories of the loved  one  are.  Remaining in the sadness of the past can deepen one’s personal sadness.  It can perhaps lead to a period of depression which may exist for a longer period of time.

For grieving persons the future is a big unknown.  How life will unfold and progress is quite unclear.  Worrying about what will be or what could happen can easily lead to increased stress, fears, and anxiety. Projecting what the future will bring,  too early in grief,  is not helpful.

The present is the best place where one can direct one’s attention and energy. The benefits to one’s well-being will thus be significant. Focusing on what is now, as opposed to what was or will be, can aid the grieving person to face life events one day at a time. This can insure a smoother and more effective passage through one’s grief journey.

A good suggestion might be to visit the past for briefer time periods as grieving progresses.  Trying to project future outcomes for one’s life too soon, can deepen one’s anxiety about “moving on”. The present ,therefore, is the time frame into which one can place one’s efforts at survival, healing, and growth. Stay there, for it is where your heart dictates that you should remain.

 

 

Breve de Duelo #19: Cuanto Tiempo Va Durar este Duelo?- Comenzamos este Resumen de duelo con la pregunta que se hace a menudo: “¿Cuánto tiempo durará este duelo?” La respuesta simple es que durará todo el tiempo que sea necesario para cada persona. Las personas se afligen por el tiempo que lleva curarse de un evento de la vida muy difícil: la pérdida de un ser querido o alguna otra pérdida significativa. La duración del tiempo de duelo depende de muchos factores. Aquellos que han acompañado a un ser querido a través de una larga enfermedad, tal vez como cuidador, ya han hecho parte de su dolor, pero no todos. Se afligen durante el tiempo que sea necesario después de la muerte. Las muertes repentinas, debido a que no requieren tiempo para prepararse, pueden requerir que uno experimente el dolor durante un período de tiempo más prolongado, según las circunstancias. Las muertes traumáticas por disparos, apuñalamientos, suicidios, accidentes, desastres naturales, sobredosis de drogas o las tragedias de ;a guerra suelen tener un período prolongado de duelo debido a las graves circunstancias de las muertes. La naturaleza de la relación de uno con el difunto ciertamente también afectara el tiempo de duelo. Esperar únicamente para que pase el tiempo no provocará la curación de la pena que es necesaria o requerida para permitirle a uno continuar con su vida de una manera significativa. Las pérdidas requieren un trabajo de duelo, y eso es exactamente lo que es: el trabajo. Es útil darse cuenta de que el trabajo de duelo requiere experimentar todos los sentimientos que ha despertado la pérdida. Hablar con otros sobre la perdida de uno es útil. Escribir los sentimientos de uno también ayuda. Recordar el tiempo que paso con el ser querido, recordar a esa persona en ocasiones especiales y celebrar la vida de la persona de laguna manera especial será una parte necesaria del trabajo de duelo que uno hace. Cuando se considera el tiempo y el dolor, es importante observar las fases del tiempo: ayer, hoy, y mañana. Inicialmente, es reconfortante volver a los recuerdos del pasado no muy lejano, porque es allí donde se encuentran los recuerdos tristes, pero recientes, de la persona amada. Permanecer en la tristeza del pasado puede profundizar la tristeza personal. Tal vez puede conducir a un período de depresión que puede existir durante un período de tiempo más largo. Para las personas en duelo el futuro es una gran incógnita. ¿Cómo se desarrollará la vida y el progreso es bastante claro. Preocuparse por lo que será o lo que podría suceder puede conducir fácilmente a un aumento del estrés, los temores y la ansiedad. Proyectar lo que el futuro traerá, demasiado temprano en el dolor, no es útil. El presente es el mejor lugar donde uno puede dirigir su atención y energía. Los beneficios para el bienestar de uno serán, por lo tanto, significativos. Centrarse en lo que es ahora, a diferencia de lo que fue o será, puede ayudar a la persona afligida a enfrentar los eventos de la vida de un día a la vez. Esto puede asegurar un paso más suave y efectivo a través del viaje de la pena. Una buena sugerencia podría ser visitar el pasado por períodos de tiempo más breves a medida que avanza la aflicción. Tratar de proyectar resultados futuros para la vida de uno demasiado pronto, puede profundizar la ansiedad de uno sobre “seguir adelante”. El presente, por lo tanto, es el marco de tiempo en el que uno puede ubicar sus esfuerzos de supervivencia, curación y crecimiento. Quédate allí, porque es donde tu corazón dicta que debes permanecer.

 

 

 

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Mass Times / Horario de Misas

Saturday Vigil / Vigilia del Sábado
5:00 PM
7:00 PM (en español)
Sunday / Domingo
8:00 AM
9:30 AM
11:30 AM
6:00 PM
Daily Mass Schedule / Misa Diaria
Monday – Saturday / Lunes-Sabado
8:30 AM
Holy Days of Obligation / Días Santos de Obligación
7:00 AM
12:00 PM
7:30 PM
*unless otherwise announced / *A menos que se anuncie algo diferente.

Devotions

Adoration / Adoración
Monday / Lunes 6:00 PM – 8:00 PM
Confession / Confesiones
Monday / Lunes 7:00 PM – 8:00 PM
Benediction / Bendición
Monday / Lunes 7:45 PM

Fr Jack’s Challenge